Yes, I know you can't see a lot of you in this picture...that's the point!! You actually felt comfortable enough to wander away from me! Pretty far too! I'm so proud of you, I feel like today was a major step in you feeling comfortable in groups of strangers, and me doing the right thing as a mum. Here's what happened:
We decided to go to the kids museum this morning. Usually we spend an hour or two there on Sundays. Typically what happens is we get there and I attempt to put you down amongst all the other kids, and you immediately turn around, lift your arms up at me and say "UP! UP!" My usual reaction is to say something like "Don't you want to see the pretty fruits at the pretend grocery store?" or, "Why don't you grab a book and bring it back to me so that we can read it?" The theme is basically that I'm trying to get you out into the museum, wandering and exploring amongst the other children, without you being attached to my hip. Not because I don't love carrying you (well, it's not as fun as it sounds-you do weigh nearly 26lbs!) but because I want so much for you to experience the joy of playing like the other kids, and exploring new surroundings.
Well, over the last few weeks, as you've gotten more and more clingy, I realized that this just isn't the right method. You need your time to warm up to new environments, and if I am your security blanket, then so be it. So into the museum we went today, and together we sat at the table with blocks. I picked it because no one else was sitting there, but lots of other kids were around at other stations playing. You can observe from afar and get your feet wet. We spent 15 whole minutes there! For you, 15 minutes is an eternity and you usually flutter from one thing to another within seconds. But you loved sitting in my lap, handing me different colored blocks to stack, and point out what all the other children were doing. It was a beautiful 15 minutes where you and I both just felt so right. I know that sounds weird, since we were just sitting there stacking blocks, but it was perfect.
Then we continued to the usual stations you enjoy. And we stayed close together, in fact, attached at the hip. Usually I would try to nudge you out there, but today I realized that you don't need the nudge, you just need the time. Sure enough, when another girl came to play at our station, you didn't flip out with nerves, as you often would, but you watched her and felt comfortable. We were partners, and you knew it!
We went outside to sit in the sun and have some lunch. Once again, I would normally try to sit amongst all the other kids, but today I picked a patch of grass away from the play area, where you could observe, and feel comfortable. We had lunch, played some music and danced. As the hour passed, you ventured out. First you asked me to come with you, so I followed you out to the field where all the kids were playing with balls, and you picked up a ball and brought it back to our sitting area. Then, you did it again....alone! And again and again and again! Until we had a pile of balls and you even walked so far away from me at one point you couldn't even see me! I was so proud of you! And of myself! I think we might have finally done it...figured one another out! We're partners baby- Finley and Mummy makes TWO!
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